dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
It's 1:26 and I have already found 5 fruit flies between 3 separate glasses of wine. This is supposed to be a summer problem. Fucking global warming.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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