Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
Randomize
