Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
BRIAN AND ANTHONY SPOON FED MY BROTHER MACARONI AND CHEESE WHILE HE WAS FUCKING ZARA. THEY WENT TO HIGHFIVE HIM AND ZARA WAS LIKE "WOO!" AND HIGHFIVED THEM FIRST
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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