Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
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