That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
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