yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
And dont tell me its his job to cockblock me just because he's my boyfriend.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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