"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Randomize