ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
