if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
Tonight I celebrated marriage equality by letting a girl I don't know kiss me at the club.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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