It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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