angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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