Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
If we don't get kicked out of this hotel tonight for fucking too loud we're breaking up
I smelled my fingers after she left and they smelt like sugar cookies. I want that one again.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
All she said was "Do me by Friday."
Randomize