I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Welcome to the difference between being FWBs (remember how we used to see who could get more lap dances a night?) and being in a relationship. Fun, huh?
I'm confident that their children would come out as 100% authentic rats
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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