careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.