Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
Next time a random bus filled with santas pulls up to the bar, I'm not getting on it.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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