why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
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