i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize