when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Randomize
