So I purposely left a bunch of metal in my pockets so that the smokin hot TSA officer would give me a pat down. Airport security just got fun
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
The power of my boobs compel you
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
One of my pillows is missing but it's cool because there is a beef stick.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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