I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
Like sometimes I’ll be hangry but for dick
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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