jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
