one two three fourrrrnication!
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
Yess he was literally so drunk that like at one point I'm pretty sure he thought it was hard and in when neither were true :/ haha
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
