just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
found used condoms and an omlet in my uggs. I'm disgusted but not surprised.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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