He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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