he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
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I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
I tackled a mailbox like a linebacker. He almost broke his hip and his friend lit a bottle rocket off inside of the car. Yes it was a successful night.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
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It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
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