While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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