Small penises have feelings too.
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.