In the future we'll all be gay
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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