i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
