There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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