at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
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