did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
You left your phone here
Wait...
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
