Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
.....woke up with a tube of cinnamon buns in my pocket, i miss you
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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