I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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