Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
First of all you can never say anal too much. Second I now think you're a total gentleman.
Rarely has that paragraph ever been put together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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