is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
He just washed his hands with scrubbing bubbles yelling "They work hard so I don't have to!"
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Randomize