i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
Randomize
