VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
