Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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