You really coming over, don't trick.
i permit you to call me
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
If I don't quit picking up guys when I'm drunk, I'm going to need a vagina transplant.
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
i now understand why vodka
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
