he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
