The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Randomize
