It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
he is so annoying
so stop sleeping with him
yeah but he is so hot when i'm drunk
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
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