Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Sometimes I worry for your future but then I remember how big your boobs are.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize