it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Well you were already wet from trying to drink straight from the faucet, so I just put you in the bathtub with a pillow and called it a night
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
