PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
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I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I climbed up on the tank of the toilet so I could take a slo-mo vid of myself pissing into the garbage can, but the base of the toilet shattered and I had to bail.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
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