Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
I'm sitting on our balcony drunk. And in my underwear. Our relationship with our neighbors may improve.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
Randomize
