Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
I wish I could punch you in the face.
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Randomize
