All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
the parents are super pissed...made eye contact with the mom while going down on another girl
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
