Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
She is the Michael Jordan of blowjobs. Unfortunately, her baby sister is the Michael Jordan of baseball of blowjobs. It does not run in the family.
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I need water and some morals
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
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